Tuesday, November 27, 2012

All Aboard The Crazy Train..

So I'm on day 4 of my shots and I have been feeling a little hormonal, tired, headachy, and irritable. Slightly more than I remember last time. I'm on a higher dose of meds, so that could be it. I also feel a little crazy. And I know I am starting to act a little crazy and irrational.. I can see it, I just can't help it sometimes! Here's a couple of examples of my medicine-induced-twin coming out:

The night before last, Presley (our 1 year old bulldog) was chewing on the blanket in her cage (which is almost a nightly routine for her) and it was annoying me so bad, so I yelled at her and made her get out of the cage and I took her blanket out and put her back in on the piece of plastic that covers the bottom. I have no idea what I was thinking because her moving around on the plastic is way noisier than her chewing on her blanket. I didn't want to switch it back and I was soo tired (even though it was only like 8:30) so I fell asleep. At 3 am, I woke up to the soud of her moving around again and I was so mad! I got up and took her outside and gave her food and came back upstairs. She started barking as soon as I was upstairs so I put her blanket back in her cage and went and got her from outside. She went right into her cage and back to sleep.. Unfortunately I couldn't fall back asleep so I just lay there, thinking of how ridiculous I was acting that night. I freaked out over nothing and just went a little ballistic at something so stupid. I apologized to Eric in the morning for being a maniac. Of course, he's used to it so he just said it was fine and he loved me. I love that man.

Then last night we were having Family Home Evening about having a positive attitude and not being negative so we can have a good feeling in our home. My dad selected me to participate in the object lesson. Basically, the object lesson is to say negative things to a person and then hold down their arms and try to have them lift them up and then tell them positive things and repeat. When a person is told negative things, their arms are weak, and when they are told positive things, they are much stronger. So my dad proceeded to tell me negative things like I'm messy and don't clean up the house and how
I made bad choices and I suck at this activity.. As he was saying all of these things to me, even though they weren't really mean or true, I just started crying. CRYING! I never cry! Like ever. I've cried only a handful of times in our entire marriage and there I was, just tearing up like a little nincompoop. Then when he started saying positive things like how I'm a beautiful daughter of God and my smile lights up a room and my bubbly personality is contagious, I just cried again! It was super lame and I felt like an idiot and punched my dad for picking me when I'm so hormonal.

I hope I don't get any worse haha. I'm already on the crazy train and we are just getting started! I am pre-apologizing to anyone I come in contact with over the next few weeks, for I am not quite myself:)

My tummy is looking more like a pin cushion and starting to bruise some, and I can literally feel my ovaries growing. It's kinda cool and not, at the same time. In about a week or so, my ovaries will be nearly the size of softballs- youch!

Also- I'm not an expert and linking with blogger on my phone (we still don't have Internet) but I wanted to give a shout out to two of my infertility blog friends! Kat at Trying To Make 3 and Amanda at Growing Griswolds both got great news for their Thanksgivings- they're both pregnant!! :) Couldn't be happier for them! Hopefully the positives come our way! ;)


  1. Well first off I must comment on the picture. Those are AWESOME PJs and holy cow look at that ring?!?! :D It does look a tad painful but you could pretend they're just irritating freckles from God. :) I'm crossing my fingers for you guys this time. Your crazies will eventually fade in time. Love ya!

  2. Ohhhh the crazy train, I'm still on board! ( I think I have a permanent seat)
    Thanks for the shout out, we are beyond excited, I'm just praying this one works for you too!